Lesson 60: Believe

Today, while reading a New York Times article, I learned that a child drops out of high school every 26 seconds an that the United States has dropped to #12 among developed nations in 25-34 year olds with a college degree. Aside from being shocked, I was embarrassed.

However, I also finished reading Whatever It Takes by Paul Tough. While the stories of the students and their parents really stick with me, the thing that I remember first and foremost, is the Promise Academy's creed:

I promise to always dream out loud, To lift my head and be proud. And never end up a face in the crowd.

I thought about the first eighth grade class reciting that together at their graduation and imagined what their faces looked like as they lived through that moment. And I though that it was a huge promise not only to themselves but to the people who had witnessed their journey. Sure, the path was strewn with thorns and forked paths, but at some point, someone had to believe that they would make it to that point despite the challenges and despite the odds stacked against them.

What made Geoffrey Canada believe that he could, in essence, save a generation of poor children in Harlem is exactly what we need now. With the American economy in less than optimal shape and nations racing to be the best in the world, there is no excuse for not believing in whatever it takes to succeed. And with the Harlem Children's Zone reaching the successes that it has reached, there's no reason why we shouldn't believe that big dreams can come true with the proper leaders, plan and drive to make it happen.

Lesson 59: Love

I was thinking about this blog this morning. I'm not thinking it's ridiculous or that the premise is stupid. I am, however, starting to question its origin.

Everyday I've been trying to identify something new that I've learned. I figure that if I'm lucky enough to find an extraordinary man, marriage won't be quite like that. Am I really going to stop at the end of every day and ask myself, "Did I learn something from my husband today?" If I do, the marriage probably isn't working out. Not that I know for sure but something tells me there are way better things to do in a marriage than seeing if pre-nuptial expectations are being met.

Maybe I'll get married one day and maybe I'll learn something new from the man I'll spend the rest of my life with everyday. But if I don't, I don't think I'll love him any less, especially if he's still willing to love me unconditionally.

The most important lesson of all in this little experiment: Love matters more than learning...Actually, love matters more than anything...and it makes you think and do crazy things that matter only because love is present.

Lesson 58: Surprises

Surprises can be happy or sad. They can be extravagant or subtle. Some people love surprises. Others, not so much. The content of said surprises matters, as does the time you deliver them.


Today I had the chance to surprise someone with some good news, and her reaction was heartwarming. She was so gracious and grateful for the good news, and I couldn't help but be happy for her. On the other hand, I don't think that some people don't do well with surprises when they come at 6 in the morning. Maybe they do better when they come at other times. Who knows? But the big lesson here is that I'm capable of pulling off a surprise (or am I?)

Lesson 57: Incept This!

 Last night I had a dream about giving birth to a precious baby girl. When she was only two days old, she was able to lift her head and roll over all by herself. Of course I woke up early this morning wondering what having such a precocious baby girl  for a daughter could possibly mean, so I looked it up on DreamMoods. This is what I learned.

Baby

To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings.  Babies symbolize something in your own inner nature that is pure, vulnerable, helpless and/or uncorrupted. 

If you dream that you are on your way to the hospital to have a baby, then it signifies your issues of dependency and your desires to be completely cared for. Perhaps you are trying to get out of some responsibility. If you are pregnant in real life, then a more direct interpretation may simply mean that you are experiencing some anxieties of making it to the hospital when the time comes. 

That's just a portion of the definition that I pulled from the site. It amazes me that there are actual fields for analyzing dreams. My initial thought after having this dream was simply that I must have been reading to the baby girl while she was still in my womb and that was what caused her advanced development.

Ultimate lesson of the story: Read to your kids.

Lesson 56: Size Matters

Today I was reading Whatever It Takes by Paul Tough and came across the following passage:

"You have to walk in the door with a take-no-prisoners, I'm-in-charge, move-over-a-new-sheriff's-in-town, let-me-at-them attitude."

Pinder was a burly African American in his late thirties with a reputation as a disciplinarian....He wore a tan suit, perfectly tailored to his substantial frame.

This man, Glen Pinder, was charged with turning the Promise Academy charter school in the Harlem Children's Zone around and raising test scores, two daunting tasks that required a lot of structured leadership and unprecedented expectations from students (and parents) who were previously dismissed as hopeless cases.

And while the book is great and I'm enjoying every minute of it, I thought instead about size in relation to leadership. Clearly, Paul Tough thought that Pinder's "substantial size" was important enough to be mentioned, but I wonder what would have happened if a diminutive principal had walked into that school instead. As a female who is shorter than the average 28-year old woman, I've heard all kinds of short jokes. Most of the time I just let them roll of my shoulder. Sometimes if they're particularly creative, I'll laugh. But then again, some of them really get old. But I felt better when I saw today that there are some advantages to being short:

Shorter people are less likely to break bones when they fall, have faster reaction times, greater ability to accelerate body movements and are less likely to get severely injured in a car accident.

Shorter people have a smaller impact on the environment. It was found that people averaging 6 feet and 190 pounds can impact human survival by creating more pollution and depletion of resources, such as water, energy and oil.

Shorter people live longer. Bigger bodies need more cells and duplication of cells is limited.

Short people have a lower center of gravity, and having a lower center of gravity gives someone better balance and stability.

Aside from these scientific advantages of being vertically challenged, I also found these humorous ones from a taller than average girl:

1) You can buy clothes that actually FIT you. If they're too long, who gives a care, you can hem them, it's not that hard. If they're too short, there's not really anything you can do except add different fabric, and that just looks weird, and you can really tell.

2) It makes you cute. :) You're probably sick of hearing it a lot if that's said to you all the time, but at least it's a positive thing, unlike being called a giant. :\

3) A lot of guys prefer smaller girls. They like to protect them.

4) You can slip away easily in crowds. Positive if you WANT to. Negative if you don't, but it wouldn't be the hardest sticking with your posse.

5) People can pick you up, because you weigh a lot less. You can be piggy-backed and all that fun stuff. :)

6) You tend to have smaller feet, therefore it is a bit easier finding cute shoes rather than looking for huge sized ones.

7) When you're dancing, you don't have to duck while spinning under someone's arms...

8) It's easier to do the limbo! :)

9) You don't get interrupted while working every second of the day to help somebody reach something because they're too lazy to grab a chair to stand on.

So I guess that when it comes to being 4'10, I'll suck it up and wait for someone to grab a piggyback ride from so that I can reach the cookies on top of the fridge. :-)

Lesson 55: We're Not Teenagers Anymore.

Today's lesson is brought to you by the cast of High School Musical.

I'm only a little bit ashamed to admit that I've watched this movie...and I have downloaded it to my computer from iTunes. My niece, who was six at the time of the DVD release went so far as to teach her younger brother (who was three) all the song and dance routines. It was the cutest thing, and they (not Zac Efron--I think he looks like an elf) are the reason why I still have that movie on my laptop. And truth be told, it's actually a really good movie with all the wholesome feelgoodness...and of course, I never say no to bursting into song in the middle of a school. (See previous blog posts about Glee and other musicals)

But anyway, I have been asking friends for advice on various aspects of my life and today I got a great piece of advice: "We're not teenagers anymore. Just say what you want." This is how I learned that in order to get what you want, you have to shed your adolescent insecurities and be willing to stand up for yourself. When the time and conditions are right, there's no need to be afraid of speaking up for yourself. Sometimes you can even get what you want out of speaking up. No need to assume that things won't go your way before you even try to get a hold of them.

"This isn't high school" is right. I was helplessly awkward in high school, and while I can't say that I've got enough self-confidence to supply the cast of High School Musical, I like to think that I've become sure enough of myself to go after what I want. And if I don't get it, my ego won't be as bruised as it was when I didn't go to prom with the guy I had a crush on way back when...Thank God.

And aside from all this, I know I'm not a teenager anymore because some of the people I met in high school weren't so great. They were mean and selfish. And while some people haven't outgrown that kind of behavior (sometimes I wonder if I have outgrown that behavior), I'm pleased to say that there are some great people who have walked into my life that make me want to grow up and be a better person. Like you

Lesson 54: Don't Stop Believin'

My previous post was about how running can make everything better. I found something else that can make everything better when I'm feeling down: Glee reruns. (Gleeruns?)

I loved the season finale when the team decided to sing Don't Stop Believin' (Who doesn't love that song?) As cheesy as it may have been, they decided that despite the way that the odds were stacked against them, they were going to enjoy the journey they had been on and not stop believing in themselves.

The odds were clearly stacked against then with Vocal Adrenaline in the competition and Sue as a judge, but they went on stage anyway. And yeah, they lost regionals. But they came out with some pretty great lessons anyway.

This is why Glee appeals to so many people. There are no expectations of perfection or happy endings. It's all about the life lesson that the kids learn, how they're in it together and how no matter what, they don't stop believing in their journey.

Personally, I've learned that the more I doubt myself, the more I cry, but when I believe in myself, people are more likely to believe in me.